omaceful, like selling a car ank of petrol. So I arted drinking te  ty, and after Id arted spinning round and round.

    e  for a little . Jess offered to cer ell  Martin  been  Martin asked o explain  t trut so bad, and Martin said t  badly of old t hinking of killing himself.

    Youre mad, said Jess. S . Youd probably get a sympathy shag.

    Martin laug ts  works, Jess, he said.

    ? Because if s , it  s a terrible t t your lover is so uns to die. Its a time for self-reflection.

    Yeao spend  feel like holding her hand.

    Youd still end up  say it would be easy.

    Sometimes it  Jess  of us, ill s knoy  to kill myself, and you could tell t JJ and Martin  too. But  , t of t doea, and t on  of your day. alking about sympatercourse and o  see o climb tairs up to t s  killing ourselves, but  oo close to jumping. And yet Jess  of all of us to going over. JJ  come out of tairin   dangling over t  actually nerved o do it. Id never even got as far as t if Martin  sat on Jesss , Im sure of t.

    Lets play a game, said Jess.

    F— off, said Martin.

    It o go on being s  to get to tage  t o an end. But tting used to it made me realize somet made me realize t notins flat, I could look back on myself - t t by a little bit of bad language! Id got older even during t. You get used to t, t youre suddenly different,  you o like t sort of music, even if it  opped, and nots t makes you die inside, and eventually s to make you die on tside too. People